So I just started a sign language class. It's really cool because it's what I've ALWAYS wanted to do my whole life. Now I can interpret and I can use it with my kids now too. I go to my second class tonight. And then soon I'll be starting my medical claims and billing schooling. I have to wait until the court date for child support at the end of this month so that I'll have a set amount coming in other than that I can't pay monthly for it. He just got the papers for the court date last week and he didn't sound very happy about it. It's funny. I'm glad, I can't wait for them to start taking it out of his checks so that he can't just send me whatever he wants. The jerk moved to a smaller apartment and refinanced both his cars so that he would have more a month and still sends me a tiny bit and expects me to live off that. So I've been extremely stressed out lately since my brother and his wife and their kids are living here too. They have a lil girl that is well, how can I put this nicely? A hellion! Ethan is having a hard time since he's lost his dad and then gotten a sibling and lost most of his attention from me and coming from a quiet life in Oregon to here with a million people. He's trying and I'm trying to deal with it. I've resolved to not yell at him, I was getting really bad there for a while but I can see already that when I stop yelling at him and talk to him about things he acts better toward me. He loves his lil brother SO much too. and Owen just lights up when he comes and talks to him. Owen is having a hard time with the teething right now. But he does better when I sit and rub his gums. He's getting such a cute personality too. He and Ethan are sitting watching Monsters Inc. right now. Ethan knows his alphabet now but he just needs to work on visually recognizing them. I find it's easier for him to learn when I use names for letters then actual words. Like he knows that O is for Owen and E is for Ethan. He knows what his name looks like written down too. I was going to move out the other day after my two brothers got in another fight but I can't. unfortunately I won't be able to for a while. I just am feeling REALLY cramped. My brother and his wife are acting really immature about things. They act like we all owe them something and they are the ones with more than all of us combined. My brother that has been living here (Dean) has been taking care of my mom and dad for years, he's been paying their rent and helping them out even before his wife died. She died a year ago January 3rd of cancer. So he moved in to help them. He then in the last few months has had to file for bankruptcy because the medical bills were just too much for him. So he turned over his company to my other brother to help him out since he didn't have any job or income. Now my brother won't give Dean any money that he's owed. Dean even gave him all his tools and jobs. They haven't even given my mom and dad any money since they've been here, using the water, electricity and all. It's just making me mad and I have been giving my mom and dad everything I can. It's frustrating because my parents won't ask for any money even tho my brother and his wife have gone out and bought two iPods, started a membership at a gym with a daycare in it, gone shopping and bought new workout clothes and a ton of toys and clothes for the kids. It's like they are flaunting their money in front of us all and we are starving. I begged for money enough from the "sperm donor" in November and he gave me too much according to the state so they cut me off from cash assistance and cut down my food stamps. So I can't even help out my parents as much as I was. I was buying the food for the house. My brother and his wife are getting food stamps too, almost three times what I get. GRRR!!! Sorry I guess I just needed to vent. I am irritated that I was so close to my sister in law and now she's acting like a bratty lil girl that doesn't get her way right now. I'm sick of losing people in my life. I'm sick of having friends or husbands, you know...people you are supposed to trust with your life, and them turning out to be a waste of time. I'm in such a need of someone to talk to it's not even funny. But oh well. I keep thinking that if I just keep myself busy with school and the boys that I'll get through this with what's left of my sanity.
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